By Charlotte ‘Poddy’ Wilson
After four years, my time at Oxford has come to an end. Marked by the pandemic, a failed year abroad, and a handful of health troubles, this degree is by far and away the most challenging thing I have ever done. And the greatest.
I ‘came up’ to Oxford in October 2020, cabin feverish from the months spent in lockdown, relieved after managing to avoid the predicted grade fiasco, and raring to get started. I had done my best to tackle the intimidating reading list, and was keen to begin attending tutorials and discussing the set texts with some of the most knowledgeable minds on the planet. More than anything, however, I was incredibly excited at the prospect of meeting quite so many like-minded fellow students. I had spent my school years feeling like a complete oddball, and in many ways, it was my ambition to reach Oxford and discover my crowd, that had instilled such a drive in me. And Oxford did not disappoint. The friends with whom I am leaving university are the ones I’ll be keeping for life.
The work was hard – there was no getting around that. For the first time in my life, having always felt very secure in my intelligence, I experienced impostor syndrome. This never really went away, particularly during my final, in-person exams, when I looked around at a sea of my peers and felt utterly unworthy of my scholar’s gown. In Hilary term of first year, when I was once more forced to attend lessons from my childhood bedroom, the impostor syndrome was at its worst. I had no conception of how well or badly any of my classmates were doing, and more or less my only interactions with the outside world were the handful of contact hours I completed over Teams – naturally, I began to fear the worst: that my acceptance into the university had been some egregious error on the part of my tutors and that I was trailing desperately far behind. I cannot understate the relief, therefore, when, at the end of term, my tutors told me how pleased they were with my progress and my engagement with the course material. If nothing else, Oxford has taught me the value of self-belief, and of persistence in the face of doubt.
I came back to Oxford in October 2023 after my year abroad had been cut short only six weeks in due to ill health. I had hit my lowest ebb at that point, and, after a significant recovery period, I was more than a little trepidatious about my grand return. I oughtn’t to have been. My final year was the best of my life. I played lead roles in two amazing plays, I adored every second of my academic work, I went on an amazing exchange weekend to Trinity College Dublin, and, above all, I forged THE most amazing friendships. I felt like I had finally found a life rhythm that suited me down to the ground, perfectly balancing my library hours and social downtime, and getting enjoyment out of every day. In the final push, I truly put my all in, and I am very proud to say that I’ll be graduating with a first-class degree.
And, through it all, there’s been That Oxford Girl. I became a TOG ambassador at the very beginning of my degree, having followed the account religiously for years beforehand. What with the pandemic, it wasn’t until my second year that I was finally able to meet other ambassadors at TOG socials, and the network of girls that I discovered was one forged from mutual support and encouragement. I continued to write articles throughout my degree, about my course, my involvement in drama, and my numerous self-discoveries, as well as getting to watch and review a couple of amazing shows at the New Theatre for the blog. Just before my final year began, I reached out to Tilly and asked whether she had ever considered the idea of a spin-off podcast for the blog, and pitched the concept to her. I’m so grateful for how receptive she was to the idea, and it has been one of my greatest joys to present and produce the podcast over the course of the last year, interviewing so many amazing young women about their respective Oxford experiences.
I’ll be forever grateful for everything that Oxford has taught me, especially beyond the course materials and academic skills: I have learnt so much about myself through tackling all the challenges that have been thrown my way, and I am so excited for the incoming cohort this year who have all this self-discovery ahead of them. My advice is to pay attention to what works for you, and sparks joy for you, and to implement these things into your routine as much as you are able. More than anything, I advise you to make each day count. Four years have disappeared in the blink of an eye, and I’m so thankful that I relished every moment as much as I did.
Good luck to all the new That Oxford Girls, from a misty-eyed outgoing one!
Charlotte ‘Poddy’ Wilson xx
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